Is this fun??????

Yeah!! Looks like we have our first member that I don't know!!  So exciting to see that!!  Welcome!!


So my blog today is really around how we spend our times as mom's with other mom's.  Being a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, spending time with other mom's can be quite different.  I've noticed since becoming a stay-at-home mom, I still want to have the adult interaction that work out of the home provides, but don't always get it.  So then, I schedule a play date of some sort or go to a class.  Classes and play dates are the best ways for me to meet other mom's during the day.  I'm not even sure I always go to all of these classes during the day just for the kids. I do it a lot of times, just to meet other people.  The best ones are where we don't talk about the kids at all.  But most of the time the conversation revolves around the kids.  Which is OK in most cases. But once in a while, I get one that just sends me home thinking..."Was that fun????"  And at the end of it I feel more exhausted than energized as a mom!!


So let me start off by saying a majority of play dates I go on are fun!!  Or, I wouldn't keep doing them, but like I said, once in a while I get one that is just down right exhausting mentally!!!  Physically, it's OK, but mentally???  That's not good!!


So, let me give you an example.  I've been trying to meet up with this mom who I'm not sure we are a good mix.  (Don't worry, it's not you and you don't know her. ;o)  I know you don't know her because she doesn't use a computer. ;)  I've gotten the bad mom's use the computer speech).


Anyway,  she's super sweet and nice, but every time I meet with her I'm just exhausted!!!  It's like a competition of who is the better mom.  Half the time I'm not even talking because she's telling me how great of a mom she is the entire time.  I'm not quite sure why she's doing this.  Is she trying to impress me, does she think she needs me to validate her as a mom, does she just always talk like this???  The questions are never ending.  This has been going on for about a year now and I'm just not sure what to do.


She talks about how she has taught her kids this and that.... how they know this and that... how they are doing this and that..... and on and on and on....


I don't mind this necessarily, because I do like to hear about how others are doing.  But then I get the questions of .... "Is your kid doing this?  Is your kid doing that????


Why can't she just say, "How are your kids doing?"


Then I feel I have to explain, yes or no, and why or why not and then I'm feeling like "Is she judging me right now??"  Am I suppose to be doing this or that with my kid???  Is my kid behind?? Am I lacking as a mom because I'm not doing these things with my kid too???  Ugh!!!!!!!  It's downright exhausting!


And who needs any more questions placed on them about how they raise their kids then they already place on themselves anyway???  I don't know about you, but I can beat myself up as a mother better than anyone else can!!


So, is this just me, or do you ever feel like being around other mom's can sometimes feel like you are in a competition for "who is the better mom award"?  What are your best responses to some of these types of things?  I have just been ignoring it, but then I find myself ignoring her.  I suppose just because we are both mom's doesn't mean we need to hang out together, but it's kinda sad, because I can tell she truly is a good person.  I want to feel energized after I have a play date.  Good conversation, good things to talk about, not a competition.


Why does this happen????


What do you say???